


the same.

by blurrytyler



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M, Or not, enjoy, i will make something not sad one day, i wrote this at two am and forgot about it, idk - Freeform, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-06-07 16:20:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6812962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blurrytyler/pseuds/blurrytyler
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>josh, who's body was pressed to the cold floor, sobbing to no one, yelling for someone to blame, wishes it could just be the same.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the same.

tyler isn't really all there anymore, and of course josh has caught on to it, but he pretends it's not happening. he shoves it to the back of his mind and leaves it there, let's the bitter reality just linger in the back of his head and doesn't bother to go back to it. 

it might be a little selfish, but josh doesn't think it's all too _fair_ that this is happening to him. he often think about the months leading up to this point, how he was slowly slithering away, how he didn't do things he used to do, rather did other more absurd things. he reminisces in past thoughts, wraps himself in a blanket of thoughts of the old tyler, hiding from the new, cold reality.

four years ago, tyler and josh met at some unknown shady bar with a cheesey neon light sign out front. there was a a band playing, not well, but it did provide an ever so convenient loud noise to which people can't talk over. it's dark in the small quarters. tyler is there, alone, chugging beer after beer to forget whatever the fuck happened just a few hours ago. tyler, even though the two become close over the timespand they knew each other, never told josh what occurred that day that made tyler drink himself silly. josh was at the bar because he was supposed to meet up with some girl, but he's been sat at the front bar for 45 minutes and had heard and seen far too much. 

tyler stumbled off of the stool he's been planted on and walks over to the dude with blue hair. "your hair," josh remembers exactly what tyler said to him, "its the color of my underwear right now."

josh was never the kind of person to associate himself with someone intoxicated, and as weirdly chlice' as this sounds, josh describes it as a strange gut feeling that told him it's alright, and before he even has time to think logically, he's discussing poetry with someone who can hardly speak. 

currently though, josh is just replaying their first encounter again and again in his head. he thinks about the weeks after that bar, how tyler proved himself to not just be a drunk and actually a well talented kid who highly enjoys poetry. there were other moments of course that highlighted the peak of their relationship, like late night talk sessions featuring tea and music playing low through the speakers on the porch, long phone calls when tyler went back to school, walking outside without a destination when its cold as hell and they could see their breath but didn't really give a shit, making the clump of trees at the park where no one really went to _their_ spot for whenever one of them felt like a mess and just needed the other, but god, that first moment you meet someone that strongly impacts you, it'll get you. 

josh tucks the poor, vegetable-like state tyler into bed and kisses his forehead.  he walks downstairs into the basements and lies down on the cold, hard floor, and he begins to cry.

it wasnt _fair._

josh remembers that one day, they're at their spot, sat on the dirt ground and tyler is plucking out the grass. josh got nothing more than a shaky-voiced phone call with two words: 'here. now.'  
once he got there he took a seat next to tyler and rolled a shred of grass in between his thumb and pointer finger. it was silent for a brief moment, all you could here were the leaves rustling and the hard wind that stung their cheeks. and then, tyler spoke.

_"am i crazy?"_

its been 11 months since then though. and of course at the time, josh said no, pulled him into a hug and the conversation was over. 11 months. a long time, and lots of things have changed since then. its kind of hard to put into words what tyler was now. he lack a personality, his personality _is_ the drugs he's prescribed. he's mostly dead, he slouches around, he lost motivation to play anything, to write, conversations are dull and all he ever wants to do is sleep. he mostly stays in his room, if not he sits at the kitchen table and watches jepordy on the small kitchen tv. josh would sit next to him and watch, neither of them knew the answers to anything, but it's the one thing that remained almost the same.

its immensely quiet within the house hold now, and it's taken some adjusting, but josh is almost used to the quiet. it was never like this pre-meds. tyler used to keep the radio on a lot, or he'd sit on the living room floor and play an instrument, it used to be loud with laughter, loud with bliss and prosperity. it's almost as if the old, lively being with a care free will  was replaced with a bleak dull-minded character.

josh, who's body is pressed to the cold floor, sobbing to no one, yelling for someone to blame, wishes it could just be the same. 


End file.
